MY "I was stung my 40 BUMBLE BEE's" Story

I HATE BEE's!

WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?

More importantly, HOW CAN I?

This is Gnarly as F**K!!!

When I was 3 1/2, I stuck my arm into an old trash incinerator. Little did I know that it was the home of DOZENS of Bumble Bee's. At the time I had on BIB overalls, and was 3!!!

They managed to get into my bibs, my hair, they were basically stinging the living CRAP out of me.

Once my clothes were stripped, and I was cleared of all bees, I was stung 12 times.

BY BUMBLE BEES!

Aren't they supposed to be the gatherers!?!?!?

Well, they gathered all my pain receptors and crammed them into one tiny compact area of my brain, that is now... POST TRAUMATIC STRESS!

I recovered, fortunately.

This was the same year that I had shot myself in the foot with a pistol. But I will save that story for my NEXT post.

YES these are all true tales, only the names are being withheld. 

That's just rude. Ya know???

STAY UP and STAY TUNED

for:

I shoot myself

The time I nearly burned the house down with a poodle. (SERIOUSLY)

I stab myself in the chest with a Calligraphy pen.

I am beaten unconscious at the age of 8, but a group of peers.

And other heart warming tales.

SOME names may be mentioned.

ALL are true.