Thursday, October 16, 2014
Wednesday, October 15, 2014
School Picture Day! The good, The bad, and the worst!
Remember school picture day?
Remember how it would either make you feel bad ass, or like a piece of shit?
Well, here are some examples of people who probably felt like shit.
Possibly a few who felt good about it at the time, to feel like a total DICK later.
"Mom, I think I have cataracts!"
No kid, your lens is just totally fucked!
Holy HELL!
I feel for the child that has to wear this shit.
"PULL ALL OF THEM, Give me dentures or implants."
With a haircut like that, glasses, and a million dollar smile,
he's taking the prom queens virginity.
Probably by force.
Mullet and Track suit says, I am a GAY "Ricky"
from "The Trailer Park boys."
In all honesty, I dig this shit and kids today would wear it.
SWAG mutha Faka. SWAG!
You know that once she hit 18 all the boys wanted to smack dat booty.
It was that awkward time from 14-17 that sucked ass.
Early 90's for fucking sure!
This dude is probably just a dick, his parents never bought his pictures,
and he didn't give two shits or a fuck.
DOUCHE BAG ALERT
Went on to contract an STD, have 6 kids with 4 women, and get fat.
"Captain, a Squall is about to overcome us!"
The 80's were fuckin' awesome man.
Ask anyone in their late 30's or early 40's.
Being an 80's kid was the shit!
I was hoping to share one of my BAD school pictures.
Instead I am going to share a BAD picture of me now.
SO WHAT if it is a surveillance pic from a robbery?!?!?!
UNTIL NEXT TIME FUCKERS!
Enjoy this video of RANDY ORTON
RKO'ing everyone randomly!
Sunday, February 9, 2014
Tuesday, February 4, 2014
Sunday, February 2, 2014
HILARIOUS Awkward Family Photos
I am sure we've all had those absolutely, 100%, embarrassing family pictures taken. WELL, here are some of the TOP family pics I could find, that are so awkward...
You almost want to pay for retakes!
1.) The kitty in my pocket Family.
NO ONE seems in sync in this picture.
2.) The "Boys Bears" family, AKA: The kids who got bullied all their lives.
2.) The "Family who is inappropriate around the children, goes to jail." picture.
3.) Can we get the weird parents to stand behind the normal children.
4.) I'm just gonna say I FREAKING HATE this type of picture.
(I am a photographer BTW. This is stupid.)
5.) Don't bother putting a shirt on dad. Just sit there with your MAN BOOBS out.
7.) "I hate my kids!"
8.) Something very SERIAL KILLER about this guy.
9.) You're not funny, your dumb... MOVING ON
10.) I do NOT think this is a FAMILY picture. If it is, there was a DVD released immediately after.
YOU HAD ONE JOB! upside down light
You ever just EFF something REAL easy up?
I am sure this isn't EZ, but damn'it...
GET IT RIGHT, it's not a LEGGO SET!
Friday, January 31, 2014
MIRROR SELFIE FAIL
SEE, ya go ahead, hook up with her...
Just ask her to wash up, because I am sure someone just left.
Thursday, January 30, 2014
MUSCLE FAIL - Seriously bro?
Seriously Bro? I need to help ALL of you on your photoshop skills.
I SUCK, and I can do better. HMU
PHOTOSHOP BREAST FAIL
LADIES you are beautiful the way you are.
THIS GIRLS breast were FINE!
BUT, if you want them to appear DIFFERENT, contact me...
I can fake it for you and spare you the humiliation.
Saturday, January 25, 2014
FAT GUY FAILS AT SKATING
I grew up fat...
OK the kid next to me in 3rd period was fat.
My family is fat, my wife is fat, my kids are fat, and my...
Well, I will just stop now.
Because NOT being fat and LAUGHING at FAT people is funny.
Friday, January 24, 2014
MY "I was stung my 40 BUMBLE BEE's" Story
I HATE BEE's!
WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?
More importantly, HOW CAN I?
This is Gnarly as F**K!!!
When I was 3 1/2, I stuck my arm into an old trash incinerator. Little did I know that it was the home of DOZENS of Bumble Bee's. At the time I had on BIB overalls, and was 3!!!
They managed to get into my bibs, my hair, they were basically stinging the living CRAP out of me.
Once my clothes were stripped, and I was cleared of all bees, I was stung 12 times.
BY BUMBLE BEES!
Aren't they supposed to be the gatherers!?!?!?
Well, they gathered all my pain receptors and crammed them into one tiny compact area of my brain, that is now... POST TRAUMATIC STRESS!
I recovered, fortunately.
This was the same year that I had shot myself in the foot with a pistol. But I will save that story for my NEXT post.
YES these are all true tales, only the names are being withheld.
That's just rude. Ya know???
STAY UP and STAY TUNED
for:
I shoot myself
The time I nearly burned the house down with a poodle. (SERIOUSLY)
I stab myself in the chest with a Calligraphy pen.
I am beaten unconscious at the age of 8, but a group of peers.
And other heart warming tales.
SOME names may be mentioned.
ALL are true.
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
WARDROBE MALFUNTION - Bike Week
I grew up around Bikers, and the women NEVER looked like this.
They chewed KODIAK and had hairy pits!
Monday, January 20, 2014
Sunday, January 19, 2014
Saturday, January 18, 2014
Friday, January 17, 2014
METH HEAD Movie Reviews
That moment when you finally get decent lighting, a green screen, and a new camera. THEN, everything is cool, funny, and awesome to shoot... In reality it's stupid and pointless... I would have cut about half of this out now. COOL FACT: Our eyes were PING PONG BALLS...
You will learn that a METH HEAD sounds like the male CONEHEAD!
You will learn that a METH HEAD sounds like the male CONEHEAD!
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
NSA SURVEILLANCE - Blatant violation of the 4th amendment
WHY did I put this here? because it is a MAJOR fail by us as a people, and our GOVT as a whole.
NSA SURVEILLANCE - 4th amendment violation
CLICK TO READ FULL ARTICLE!
NSA SURVEILLANCE - 4th amendment violation
CLICK TO READ FULL ARTICLE!
Monday, January 13, 2014
Saturday, January 11, 2014
Friday, January 10, 2014
GIRL FAIL - Fart Edition
I made this YEARS ago, looked it up to find it had over 600,00 VIEWS!
HOLY SMOKES!
I hope you sickos enjoy it as much as the others did lol
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